Gossamer

Poetry is one of the things I love, so I'm going to take a nice crack at it.


Gossamer

The light flows through
Twists
Curls
Bends
Grasp the key
Open the door


Run, Run, Run
Don't ever look back
the world you find is a far better place
the cobwebs you leave will all fall away

like wings of gossamer

Homecoming

When I was eight, right after we moved into the house that I currently call home, my teacher asked me to write about home.  I thought about it for a minute, then decided i would draw a picture, because although I was a very eloquent eight year old, I still couldn't express my feelings about home.  I drew a picture of my family, sitting around a badly drawn heart, my dad on the piano, mom on the guitar and my siblings and I singing.  That is my home.

 This weekend my mom and I drove to Rockport, Mass. to visit some old friends.  We stayed with my mom's friend who has a daughter my age.  When my brother was really little, and I wasn't even born, my mother and this women had met, and their sons had played together.  Then I was born, and the daughter was born, and we were really close growing up, until we moved away to Vermont.  We saw them a lot until last year they couldn't make it up to visit.  So we figured that we would do it this time.  The house was beautiful, as was the setting, and it was so peaceful and relaxing.  But E, as she will be called, had changed.  A lot.  She was standoffish, and we didn't really get along.  I mean we did, but not anywhere near as well as we used to.  On the last day I was there, we met E's friend Shelby, who I really liked.  As coincidence would have it, Shelby was also a ski racer, and will be attending CVA (carrabasset valley academy, another skiing school in Maine) in November.  We went to one of the quarry's and swum, without parents, for a good four hours, which was the highlight of the trip.  E changed soooo much when Shelby showed up, and it was like she was back, and the world was great.  She brought the go pro and filmed Shelby and I jumping off Bluff, i think that's what it was called, and all of the other cliffs there.  It was really fun, and I will now be scouting Vermont for any quarries to share with friends.  After we stopped swimming for lunch, Emma went to go call her mom and scout some more filming opportunities, and Shelby and I talked about skiing.  Turns out, we are a lot alike and even know some of the same people.  Shelby reminded me of how much I love skiing, which in turn reminded me of how much I truly love home.  After shelby had gone home, and said goodbye to me and E, my mom and I had to go home, and so off we went, with many goodbyes.  The two people I will miss most of the trip are Shelby, even though I don't really know her, and Julia, who is basically my godmother.  Everything about Julia reminds me of home, and family.

So on the trip back, after our unfortunate car incident, and the extra night in the super nice hotel, I sat in the air-conditioned (woohoo!) rental car and pondered home.  Even though my house might not be my home for the rest of my life, okay even though my house WON'T be the place I live for the rest of my life, I will always consider it the most mine.  This is the house, out of about ten, that I remember and probably love the most.  My sister basically grew up here, and so did my brother and I. One day, when I'm old and sitting at my kitchen table, I'll think about how much my dad played his stupid piano, and even though I said I hated it, I almost certainly loved it.  I'll remember how every night, regardless of what time it was or if she was even awake, I would give my mother a good night kiss.  I'll remember the many times I went into my brothers room to steal his big comfy shirts, or play on his computer.  I'll remember bonding over lego batman  with him.  I'll remember eating ice cream with Sophie, and watching bones on the wii, even when we wanted to tear each others throats out.  Because home doesn't just mean a wii or an xbox, home means the place that you can go when nowhere else feels right.  I don't have many more years of being a kid, sitting at the dinner table goofing off with my family.  because in two years, Gabe will be gone, and then in three I"LL be gone.  It's scary to think of how quickly the only life I've ever know is ending.  Scary but exciting, because I know I'll have my parents to be there for me.

So home isn't just my family, but that is the biggest part. Friends make up a large part too, but only the friends I feel that I've made a real and true connection with.  Meredith, the longest friend I've had, who I am just like, and who I love to death.  Emmy, her best friend completes the trio, and I also love Emmy. A few others are Kara, and although we might not be on good terms when school comes, I truly miss Christine.  Sophia is my other sister, and Ian is my other brother who I wish was my age.  Megan, when nobody else is around.  All the waterbury girls who I play soccer with, and Olivia and Julia, maybe even Liddy, because I liked her out of the context of hood.  Lucy, of course, I spend the whole summer with her.  There are others, but these are some.

Skiing is home, the water is home, a candy shop is definitely home, and the love in my heart for all of these things is home.  So thank you to my parents, who encourage me to push myself, support me in my dreams, allow me to go to a wonderful school,  who put me on my first pair of skis, and who love me so much.  Thank you Gabe for being my first best friend, and a really good brother, and thank you Sophie for reminding me of how fast times goes, and making me love you.  Thank you to my friends who make me a better person, and who are there for me when I really need it, and even when I don't want you there.  Thank you to all of the things that have shaped me, and lastly, thank you second grade teacher who asked me about home and made me realize who and what matters most, and how much I will always love home.

"This is a place that I don't feel alone.
This is a place that I can call my home."

some of the wonderful people (and cats) that i love