Thursday, January 24, 2013

Weddings and Funerals

I'm addicted to technology. If I haven't told you this before, I'm telling you now.  For chrissake's, I'm writing in an electronic diary.  So, having a computer has been one of the most destructive things ever to happen to me, ever. I spend countless hours watching TV on it, and recently there have been a lot of weddings and funerals on various shows.  Being that I'm a hopeless romantic, i've taken my own quiet delight in the weddings.  But I've also taken delight in the funerals.  Not that I take delight in the celebration in death, but i take delight in the celebration of life, of love, of what is and was.

Funerals and weddings are very similar.  Both are designed to give a proper send off, one to someone's new life, one to what someone's life was.  I can't wait for both my wedding, and my funeral.  I can't wait to experience, truly experience, love for the first time.  I can't wait to be a part of something so special, I can't wait for that part of my life to start.  And as I write this, I realize it has.  I'm not a child anymore.  I'm a person, I'm a woman.  I'm strong and independent and I hate taking help.  I'm sensitive and vulnerable, and even though I like to pretend I don't, i care about my looks.  I think and I feel and I ponder and I excite.  I dream and I hope.  I write.  I listen.  I exist.

So much isn't clear in my life, there is still so much I have left to do.  I'm not yet grown, though I'm more than well on my way.  I can't wait for everything life has in store for me, both in the wedding and funeral categories.

"I know it's gonna be, I know it's gonna be,
anything could happen."

"you've got the love"

"you're not a knot you're not a dead end, don't ever forget, you're a living thing."

"let the sun kiss your face, let the rain wash you pure, let the clouds dry you up, let the world take you in"

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